Really, this post is a rant. If you’ve no interest in listening me go off about Big Gov, quit reading. Please. If we’re real-life friends, or you’re a dirty Liberal (or both, because for some reason I have a lot of Liberal friends), I’m sorry I’ll probably offended you.
I’m angry, and scared for the country that I love. WHY?!
It’s about Bush’s Patriot Act. It’s about SCOTUS crushing AZ’s immigration law, and upholding Obamacare (interpreted “mandate” as a TAX). It’s about people who work hard for what they EARN, giving it to the Fed, for people who don’t earn. This is about a socio-economic situation that will only get worse unless “regular” people stand up for themselves. It’s about the USA becoming the Peoples State of America. It’s about the fact that people should work for the “American Dream”, not have it handed to them when they cross the border. It’s not about party “lines”, it’s about your rights/ freedoms being taken from you one, by one, by one.
1984, Fahrenheit 451, A Brave New World, We, Atlas Shrugged, Anthem, The Giver… are warnings. Not instruction manuals. What happens when your God-given freedoms are gone, and it’s too late? When is enough, enough? Is it when Newspeak becomes normal, or when a fireman SET fires, or when the gov lines their pockets in the guise of “the common good”?
I want smaller Gov, less taxes, free trade/ free market system, individual rights, and smaller military (defense only).
“Whenever any form of government becomes destructive of individual liberty, it is the right of the people to alter or to abolish it, and to agree to such new governance as to them shall seem most likely to protect their liberty.” –3.7 Self-Determination, Libertarian Party Platform
-Hey Waitress!!
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I was attempting to clean out some random boxes that (somehow) managed to make it through the last move, in effort to start consolidating all my crap (because we’re going to start house shopping)… and came across the following angsty teenage poetry. I wrote it all between sophmore and senior year in high school.
Quietly Asked
Each slice
Not a cry
But a quietly asked question
One
Why doesn’t anyone care?
Another
Will you help me?
This one deeper
Why do I hurt?
This one longer
Will it ever stop?
A fifth
Why does he ignore me?
And still no answers.
Why does she hate me?
Even after the sixth
No screams
No cries for help
More questions
Why am I so ugly?
Why am I so dumb?
Will I ever belong?
Still no answers, weather shouted, whispered, or said
Soon
A wrist, an arm, a leg
A once beautiful body
Full of quiet questions
And no answers
A cutter doesn’t cry out in pain
Who would hear me? She asks
Who would listen? He thinks
They hide their scars
Not a cry, but a quiet question
Whispered
Hanging in the air
Bleeding on a body
Asking for quiet answers
***************
So What?
She wants long legs,
And thighs to kill.
So what if it makes her pulse pound?
So what if it makes her sick?
Who cares about a tremble?
So she can be thin.
She wants a flat belly,
And perfect hips.
So what if it burns when it comes up?
So what if it tastes gross?
Who cares about enamel?
So she can be thin.
She wants a small butt,
And size 0 jeans.
So what if she fakes she’s not hungry?
So what if she eats nothing all day?
Wo cares if her stomach growls?
So she can be thin.
She wants bigger breasts,
And a smaller waist.
She’d do anything,
So she can be thin.
***************
Dreaming
I had a dream,
And in it I told you how I really felt.
And then you said you feel the same way.
But it was just a dream.
And I didn’t really tell you.
What would you say if I did?
Would you really tell me you feel the same?
Would you tell me you’ve loved me since you met me?
Would you laugh and say “no way”?
Would you say anything at all, or pretend like it didn’t happen?
Do dreams really come true?
I’d like to think so.
But I’d never tell you.
So it’d never come true.
Who really wastes time dreaming anyway?
***************
You
I like 2 think that maybe,
You miss me now,
Instead of me missing you.
How does it feel to know
That I won’t cum back like I used 2?
I don’t want you.
Not like I used 2.
I won’t cum back,
And I really mean it this time.
I like to think you miss me like I missed you.
I like to think you feel like I felt,
When I missed you,
When I just wanted to hold you,
when I just wanted to talk to you.
I like to think you miss me like I missed you.
***************
Self injury
It hurts
But it makes everything else go away
Inside and out
There are two different types
She can feel it the day after
And it reminds her of the pain
It stings and it scars
It makes her ashamed
She gets mad at herself
But can’t stop
She doesn’t even realize
And then it’s too late
One pain is gone,
But there’s another in its place
And she feels better for a while
Until…
***************
After School Special
I have a pretty razor.
Let’s see what it can do…
I’ll draw a pretty picture,
Upon a wrist or two.
I’ll draw in pretty colors,
Like red, peach, black, and blue.
I’ll take that pretty razor in the shower with me,
So all those pretty colors
Won’t stain my mother’s floors.
When I’m done with my pretty razor
After we see what it can do
The sirens will start singing.
The gurney will appear.
Everyone will be crying
About my pretty razor
On the shower floor.
They’ll wonder why I drew my pretty picture
In red, peach, black, and blue
Upon a wrist or two.
No one will know, and I won’t be able to explain.
The medics will just sigh
And shake their heads at a misunderstood youth of this nation
Mom will cry and blame herself.
Maybe they’ll make a movie
(Turn me into an After School Special)
And call it “A Horrible Loneliness” or “Upon a Wrist or Two”.
Sigh.
-Hey Waitress!!
Random thoughts on running, and the gym.
Toes straight, elbows in, engage your Abs, open your chest, head up… That’s what I think about when I’m running (AKA jogging or jiggling like a fatty macfatty pants). Running sucks. I seriously dislike it. Hate almost. But, it’s important to me to feel “active”. Being unemployed, miles on the treadmill is the most activity I get all day. I used to love running, pushing myself for one more minute, just another tenth of a mile, just a bit faster… lately though, I’ve had ALOT of trouble convincing myself to go. It might have to do with the “chest wall inflammation”, the doc told me I have, makes it feel like I’m constantly in a bear hug. That was back in February. It’s depressing, I went from running an 9:30mile, to a 12+ minute mile. This 12+ minute mile is the low light of my running. A seriously low light.
Another thing about running, is the wiggle jiggle. You know, when you see yourself in the mirror, and you’re like “WHOA! Is that supposed to shake like THAT?” That’s why I end up wearing shorts over my running capris. It makes the jiggle look less… um, earthquake causing, and shorts by themselves rub me the wrong way. Literally. My thighs rub together and it’s uncomfortable.
In an effort to get out of the gym, I’m planning on doing some training for next years 5 & 10Ks! I’m pretty pumped, outside of course! Sadly… It sorta messes up my routine. I work out in the afternoon. But, Duh, it’s summertime, and there’s no way in heck I’m running outside in the summer at 11 in the afternoon. Guess I’m going to have to get motivated to get my jiggle up in the morning! Ick. I’m not a morning person, I like my computer & coffee in the AM.
So… I’m kind of quirky (if you haven’t noticed), and a stickler for “gym etiquette”. I’m on the treadmill in the gym most days (convenience), and I like to be alone. Mostly because I can’t stand when people “heavy foot” the treadmill. You know, when they slam their feet down and shake the whole damned thing. It messes up my rhythm, and distracts me. Or the inappropriately dressed people. The ones that wear clothes that don’t fit. I’m OK with chicks in sports bras… as long as they contain your boobs! And the same thing for guys. Dudes, I don’t want to see your man junk. EW. Wear compression shorts, or at least not boxers under your gym shorts. As for the “stinky” person. I get it, sweat stinks. Personally, I’d rather smell sweat than sweat and some nasty ass perfume/ cologne. This woman was running next to me the other day, and not only was her boobage popping out the front AND sides, she was slathered in the stinkiest lotion/ perfume EVER, and playing slow jams I could hear even though I was wearing headphones! It’s called gym etiquette, bitch!
Yup. I’m most certainly quirky.
-Hey Waitress!!
So. First things first. I “wrote” this recipe for one flavor of jello, and one flavor of vodka. While I was at the grocery, I couldn’t decide which flavor vodka, OR Jello I wanted to use. It was a tough decision, and I couldn’t do it! I ended up buying Orange and Black Cherry flavored Jello, and making half and half. That’s why my cupcakes are 2 different colors!
I made the batter with Pinnacle Whipped vodka. Then I split it, used half a box of orange Jello, and half a box of black cherry. I did the same with the “poke” using the remaining Jello powder. For the black cherry cupcakes, I used Pinnacle Grape for the poke and the frosting. I continued to use the Pinnacle Whipped in the orange flavored cupcakes.
Overall, I like the orange ones better. I’m not a big fan of black cherry, and I’m not really sure why I went with that instead of strawberry or something else. Maybe I was just overwhelmed by all my Jello choices. 😉
I’m not in love with this frosting, and I’m not sure why. Maybe I’m just a buttercream girl. I didn’t care for the color it ended up. It was kind of off white, more yellow, and while it looks OK on the orange cupcakes, not so much on the grape/black cherry. Fortunatly I had some gel food color to make them the pretty pinkish color.
These cupcakes are definitely a novelty. I won’t make them again, unless it’s for a party, or a specific request. They’re pretty tasty, but not great. You can taste the vodka, it’s not too overwhelming.
The great thing about these is all the different flavor combinations you can make. Like Tequila & lime Jello! Or strawberry/grape…
Happy Baking,
-Hey Waitress!!
Unremarkable 